Singles—Is it Okay to Say, “Valentine’s Day Sucks”?

Valentine’s Day is coming up in a few days, and I’ve been getting a ton of emails for events for single people. For some reason, Christians want to encourage singles to not be upset about being single during Valentine’s Day. There are singles “love yourself” events, retreats, and all kinds of things to try to get singles to take their mind of the fact that they are single. But when is it okay to say, “being single during Valentine’s Day sucks”?

People tried to tell me the same thing when I was single. Some said “why don’t you spend the day doing something for yourself, like go to the spa or have dinner with your girlfriends?” And it did make the time pass, but it didn’t make my life any better. I was already taking care of myself and I had had enough girls night out dinners to last a life time.

Yes, I am a little annoyed with people who are so disconnected with the feelings and thoughts of “unsatisfied single people” that they throw out half-baked tips that honestly don’t address the cause of the dissatisfaction. But more importantly, I have a few questions for you to ask yourself this February 14th, so that this day is not a day you ignore, blank out of your mind, or spend doing things you hate doing.

1. Is Valentine’s Day the only time you confront the fact that you are single, and don’t like it?

We spend all year going out to events, burying our noses in textbooks and papers, and attending revivals and church services. Then February rolls around, and it hits us. “Another year and I’m still single.” If that’s you, then Valentine’s Day is not the problem. The problem is you’ve been avoiding your marital status for 350 days and finally you have to deal with the fact that you’re single and you’re not happy.

Instead of getting upset because it’s Valentine’s Day, invest your time and your energy into preparing yourself for the best romantic relationship of your life. No one ever fell in love by accident. It takes too much time and attention for any relationship to begin, bloom and grow. So let this Valentine’s Day be the day you stop ignoring what you want and start doing everything you can to get ready for the life you really want. You’ve made a good start by reading this blog. Keep it up!

2. How about some having a “This could be my last Valentine’s Day as a single person” event?

I have never seen it done, but it could be a good idea. The most exciting thing about waiting on the Lord is that you never know when it will happen. You could meet someone tomorrow. In fact, today could be the day! So, celebrate the possibilities the future can hold for you, because to wait on the Lord is not to push it to the back of your mind, or complain because it hasn’t happened. To wait on the Lord is to be excited because you know He’s still presenting Eve to Adam, and this could be the day He presents you to the man that will love you for real.

3. Are your plans for Valentine’s Day consolation prizes for not having someone to go out with, or things you’d enjoy even if it wasn’t Valentine’s Day?

No matter what your plans are for February 14th, make sure you’re spending your time doing something you truly enjoy doing. Okay, so you might not have a date. But there are TONS of things you can be doing that aren’t placeholders for a date, but things you’d consider doing if you were dating. Whatever that may be, plan to spend your time enjoying every moment of your life. You’ll never get back this day, and when you look back on your life, you’ll want to see a string of happy, exciting, and fun memories waving at you.

ChristinePembletonChristine Pembleton is a speaker, radio show host, and author of Lord, I’m Ready to Be a Wife. Order your copy of the book today by visiting

http://www.readytobeawife.com